I've been pondering that question quite a bit lately. I am one of the leaders of my middle child's Daisy troop. This year we are working on earning petals. The girls get one petal for each of the lines of the law, once they can demonstrate that they understand it. Being a Girl Scout leader is one of the greatest joys of my life, but Asperger's is getting in the way. This is my third troop, and the first one with such little girls and so many helicopter moms. Last week one of my co-leaders called to tell me that one of the moms was appalled at a joke I made to the girls in passing during one of the meetings. THREE MONTHS AGO. As a result, she was pulling her daughter from the troop and my co-leader asked me to stop coming to the meetings.
What was the joke? Good question. Back in January when I was teaching the girls how to sell cookies for the first time, I told them that it is super easy to sell Thin Mints because when a grown up sees a Daisy with a box of Thin Mints it's like crack, they just can't resist. Ever since that day, my two co-leaders and this mom have been upset with me and I had no clue. I mean, I knew they weren't really friendly, but I just focused on the girls and assumed the adults didn't like me because I was fat or new to the school or something. I never really expect to be successful with peer relationships, so their behavior wasn't out of the ordinary. In retrospect I see how they were cold and at times disrespectful, but in the moment I was clueless.
So now I'm faced with a dilemma. My daughter wants me at the meetings and I want to be there for her. I said a stupid thing, and won't ever say anything like that again, obviously. I've requested a meeting in person with the other two leaders multiple times, but have been ignored or received texts instead. I sat in my car during the last meeting, feeling the entire time like a first grader in time out. I'm frustrated that I haven't been able to do anything to fix it, and I'm frustrated that once again my big mouth and lack of filter has gotten me in a place where people are mad at me.
On the other hand, I'm also a part of an organization that tries to teach people to be honest, fair, friendly, and kind. The last line of the law says that we will be a sister to every girl scout. Is this how they treat their sisters? Keeping this from me was not honest or fair. Having multiple gossiping conversations about me is not friendly or kind. Do I have a right to be just as upset with them as they are with me? AND...would it do me any good whatsoever to tell them that I'm an Aspie, and do the very best I can, but sometimes I am going to need somebody to catch me and remind me when I'm being "inappropriate"?
One other option is walking away, and leaving my daughter in a troop run by two women who think her mom is not worthy of spending time with them. Finally, I could get our Neighborhood manager involved, who I've known for several years, and I know she would make them at least sit down and talk to me, but that would really disgust me to have to go there. How old are we? Can we just sit down and have a discussion? Can't they just look me in the eye and tell me what I did scarred their child for life and they will never forgive me? I jest of course, because it's three months later and none of the girls have had to enter rehab for a crack addiction.
Now it's up to you, dear reader. What should I do? The next meeting is two days away. The clock is ticking and I am out of ideas.
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